We'll be recapping MTV's Lucha Libre USA: Masked Warriors tonight at 11 PM CST! When the show begins hit F5 or refresh as often as you like for all of the latest updates.

Sorry the recap is a little late tonight. I was out helping my father-in-law with a car issue. Thankfully this is what DVR's are made for, so with the show waiting on demand, let's see what grand plans are being hatched on Lucha Libre USA this week!

Tonight's show opens with a teaser for RELLIK IS KILLER being back this week. Next RJ Brewer is on a cell phone complaining about how much Springfield, Massachusetts stinks and telling "his mom" that he's going to get Magno and he's going to do it in a four-sided ring. Charly Malice and Rellik will battle in the main event, but first the announcer brings out RJ Brewer and sure enough the six-sided ring is gone. The set up in Springfield looks like they're at an ROH taping instead of the normal LLUSA venue. There's even a huge HIGHSPOTS banner on the barricade behind him. "I'm standing in an American ring, which means I'm standing in the right ring. My mom got the six-sided ring banned and after tonight I plan to make the ban permanent. It's only a matter of time before this company is going to be called USA - no more masks or backflips, just pure American wrestling. Magno I know you're back there listening and that you speak English. It's only a matter of time before I humiliate you but not tonight, but for now you can fly back to Phoenix and cut my grass."

All the luchadores run out from the back and a brawl ensues! At first they were going after Brewer but now everybody's out for themselves. Marco Corleone does a suicide dive off the stage and takes out 5 or 6 guys all by himself. Chi Chi and Tigresa saunter out from the back after most of the action has already taken place. We go to a video package of Tigresa giving mini-Parka a beatdown last week. Sure enough Parka comes out with Rebecca Reyes and all the rest of the rudos and tecnicos have disappeared. Rebecca: "I have a note Mini-Park would like me to read. Based upon your actions two weeks ago, a match has been sanctioned featured Tigresa and Caliente against Mini-Park and a partner of his choosing. If you fail to compete in this match severe action will be taken." Tigresa tries to jump Parka but he escapes and we go to commercial!

* Mascara Purpura, Octagoncito y Super Nova vs. Pequeno Halloween, Lizmark Jr. y Sydystiko

Oddly enough it's the two smallest men in this trios match who are the captains for their respective teams. Even odder the match is starting out with 'Cito and 'Tiko, although Sydystiko has to get down on his knees to wrestle him - and of course gets his butt kicked for mocking him. The announcers inform us the rudo team has adopted the nickname Treachery. Purpura comes in and Sydystiko starts working him over in the corner. Purpura responds with a chop that could knock him out of his shoes and socks. I can't lie - it's a litlte disconcerting watching lucha libre in a four-sided ring. On top of that the video quality seems to be - well it looks like SmartMarkVideo. That's not bad for indie wrestling, but that's not good compared to how Lucha Libre USA usually looks. Lizmark and Super Nova brawl on the outside and he takes it on the chin on the apron. Pequeno does a suicide dive on the outside and we have a brawl on the inside. 'Tiko gives 'Cito a far too gentle slam (to the point it looks botched) and throws some chops. Purpura takes a kick to the balls while 'Tiko drops a leg across the throat of 'Cito. The announcers are acting like faces and heels and it's starting to grate on me a little - maybe I'm noticing more because the show has been on TV for almost a month now. 'Cito kicks Halloween out of the ring and hits him with a tope con hilo. Purpura does a flip dive to the outside. Lizmark hits a superkick on SuperNova and then pins 'Cito when he tries a splash off the ropes. Silly little man, did you really think you'd knock the much bigger Lizmark off his feet? WINNERS: THE RUDOS. Commercial.

Video recap of the match before the break. Apparently there is NOTHING WRONG WITH OUR TV SETS or the video quality tonight - oh wait that's just the spooky preamble to a special spooky announcement from the one and only Tinieblas Jr. "No wait. It's on this side Oriental. Don't touch it or you'll break it. Anyway, we'll destroy our foes. Marco & Lujo will be our slaves. Dude, WE THE BEST. The BEST luchadores! Let's be partners." So Oriental and Tinieblas are forming a dark faction to take over LLUSA. This is almost a serious segment, but at the end after all their bragging and boasting it turns into a comedy spot where they don't know how to turn the camera off.

Speaking of comedy that's not funny, Tigresa makes "cat got your tongue" jokes as she threatens Octagoncito in the lockerroom, and Chi Chi vows that he has ways of making men talk. That thought is scarier than Rellik's makeup. "If you're out there in the ring, this cat is gonna have a lot more than your tongue." Pretty lame Rhaka Khan, you can do better than that. On the plus side though you do look pretty hot as a luchador, so I'll take that thought with me and try to forget the exotico you team with as we go to another break.

* Charly Malice a/k/a Charly Manson vs. Rellik Is Killer a/k/a Johnny 'The Bull' Stamboli

The ring announcer seriously introduces Rellik as hailing (and I quote) FROM HELL. This is so over the top it makes me start snickering like a bad zombie flick. I don't think that's what they were going for but as long as I'm entertained I don't care how or why! It's been a while since I saw Rellik in TNA, but I'm trying to remember if his getup was quite so... well it's like a Mexican parody of The Boogeyman. I wonder what Marty Wright is up to these days. Malice takes a stomping from Rellik in the corner and gets thrown around the ring like a rag doll. "You can't call that a belly to belly suplex!" You're right Mr. Announcer - I don't think any wrestling trainer or worker anywhere would call it that. The action spills outside and Rellik feigns taking a bite out of Charly's head. Malice finally gets double boots up and starts his comeback with punches before getting a top rope clothesline. The ref warns Malice about some illegal move that I never even saw, and while he's backing Malice up Rellik turns and SPRAYS BLINDING RED MIST into Charly's eyes. WINNER VIA DQ: CHARLY MALICE. The ref gets thrown out by Rellik and Super Nova runs out to make the save. Rellik seems pleased with himself as we go to commercial.

Malice is still selling his eyes in the ring as Nova helps him up. Rellik goes over to the front row to scare little children, and they actually take the bait. The camera goes over to show us Lalo and Nigel at the commentary table before they throw to a replay video. Afterward we get a video package for La Vida De Lujo but instead of an Alberto Del Rio style vignette Tigresa stomps in with Chi Chi and starts demanding answers. Okay wait - this was a pre-taped video roll of Lujo "doing business" but Tigresa and her exotico stomp on in like they're backstage in Springfield? I know this sounds like a petty complaint but it feels like a huge continuity error. The lights are dimmed, Lujo is in his business casual shirt with the collar down (mask still on of course) and yet Tigresa just WALKS ON THE SET LIKE SHE OWNS THE PLACE. If this were TNA I'd expect this kind of absurdity but from Lucha Libre USA I expect better. The show has gone seriously cornball this week, and even though it's an entertaining trainwreck, one has to call a spade a spade. La Vija De Lujo ends before it ever had a real chance to begin. Commercial.

* Chi Chi y Tigresa Caliente vs. Mini-Park y Mystery Partner X

Because this is MTV, Tigresa can get away with coming out to Lady Gaga. Then again every indie show ever has had guys (and gals) coming out to unlicensed music, and most episodes of AAA I've ever seen have every artist from Wu-Tang Clan to Pantera for entrances. Mini-Parka ducks out of the ring and goes underneath the apron as Chi Chi and Tigresa give chase. Someone kicks Chi Chi away to make the save and guess who it is - AMAZING KONG!! Okay this show just took an AWESOME turn for the better. Tigresa and Chi Chi are shitting their collective pants. Neither one wants to get in the ring with Kong. Kong glares at Rhaka Khan, puts her hand out, and in classic wrestling style tells her to BRING IT. Well I'll give her an A for effort, but Kong throws her all the way across the ring with ease. The rudos try an eye rake and a two-on-one beatdown and it's all for naught. Parka works over Chi Chi, knocking "her" hair off and finishing with a head scissor takeover. Chi Chi gets revenge though with a leg trip into the turnbuckle. Chi Chi and Tigresa stomp a mudhole in Parka while Kong... waits patiently for a tag? That seems odd, especially given we have lucha rules in effect. She ought to just get in the ring and clean house, but they're trying to babyface Mini-Parka, so I guess she can't destroy the rudos TOO quickly. The crowd goes nuts when she finally gets tagged in so I have to say it worked. She hits a spinning backfist and a urinage and everything she does gets a pop. Mini-Parka does a springboard to the outside to take out Tigresa and Kong hits the AWESOME BOMB on Chi Chi for three! WINNERS: MINI PARKA y AWESOME KONG. That's all for this week!